Sunday, May 8, 2016

When Mother's Day Just Hurts and more...



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21 Days to a More Disciplined Life

When Mother’s Day Just Hurts

When Mother's Day is Just Hard

This post was originally posted last year… I wanted to share it again this year for those who may have missed it or who need to hear this message again.

For years, I’d dreamed of being a mom. And I didn’t just want to have a few kids; I hoped to have 12 (yes, for real!)

I came from a large family (there were 7 kids in my family) and I loved big families. Plus, I loved the idea of being a mom. So I couldn’t wait to get married and have kids.

Only, life often doesn’t pan out how you would dream. Soon into our marriage, we found out the devastating news that we’d probably never be able to have kids.

So many long-held dreams and hopes died on that day. So many visions of nurseries and strollers and rocking chairs and little feet.

And I cried many, many tears.

We didn’t tell this to many people because it hurt so badly and voicing it just made it more painful. So when someone would say something about us having children — and people made many unknowing comments of that sort in our first year of marriage — it stung deeply.

I well remember that first Mother’s Day as a newly married woman. I was sitting in church and hearing all of the moms being honored and praised. And my heart wanted to burst from how badly it hurt to know that there was a very good chance I would never be able to have kids.

I won’t ever forget what it felt like. And my heart will always hold a special place for women who struggle with the pain of infertility.

Mother’s Day isn’t always flowers and chocolate and handmade cards. For many women, it’s a hard reminder of something that isn’t, something that once was, or something that might never be.

Maybe you’ve lost a child.

Maybe you’re estranged from your mom.

Maybe your child has a life-threatening disease.

Maybe you’ve lost your mother.

Maybe you’re single and longing for marriage and motherhood.

Maybe that adoption you thought was going to go through didn’t.

Maybe you never really had a mother figure in your life.

Maybe you’re desperately longing for a child and struggling with infertility.

Maybe you are estranged from your grown child...

I don’t know your exact circumstances or the burdens you are carrying today. But if Mother’s Day is hard for you, I want you to know this: You are not alone.

I can’t be there physically to hug you and pray with you like I wish I could, but I want you to know that I care about you and others in this community here do, too.

And I would be honored to pray for you — especially this Mother’s Day weekend. If you are struggling and would like extra prayer and encouragement, would you leave a comment on this post or send me an email?

I will individually pray for each of as a small way of letting you know that, while it might feel like the rest of the world is off celebrating, there are people who care about you.

You are loved. You are not alone. You are not forgotten.

photo credit

    
 

5 Things I’m Loving This Week (+ my baby turned 7 this week!!)

5 Things I'm Loving THis Week

1. Ice Cream & Learning to Live Life in Color

I took the kids to Sonic and almost didn’t get anything for myself (I rarely do when I take the kids for a treat.), but then I remembered #TheHappinessDare… And the fact that I’m working on not talking myself out of things I might love just because they seem like an unneeded spontaneous splurge (never mind the fact that it’s less than $3 and I had plenty of Blow Money left in my envelope from the past two months.)

So I ordered this Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup Waffle Cone Sundae — much to the surprise of my entire family. And I loved every bite! I’m 34 years old and I feel like I’m finally figuring out what it feels like to live life in color!

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

2. If by Mark Batterson

I love Mark Batterson’s books and If is no exception. I’ve been underlining, re-reading sections, and sharing quotes with multiple people. I’m only 6 chapters in, but I think it’s going to prove to be an excellent read.

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

3. My Birthday Boy

This boy turned 7 this week!! For his Birthday Date with mom he chose to go walk around downtown Franklin, check out the new candy store, get crepes at one of my favorite coffee shops, and get ice cream.

Two things you may have picked up on: 1) he loves sweets (wonder where he could have gotten that from??) 2) he’s a huge KC Royals fan.

I love this boy, though it is weird to think that my baby is turning 7 and the season of “littles” is officially over. Even on the hard mothering days, I’m so grateful for the honor of being a #boymom.

Silas, you have captured my heart. I love that you still love to snuggle with me, that you say when you grow up and get married you’re going to live down the street from us, that you have such witty comebacks, that you are so scheduled and like to always have a plan, that you amaze us with your math skills, that you are so driven to excellence in baseball, that you have such a sweet heart toward your sisters, that you have endless energy, and that you learned how to read this year!!!

I can’t wait to see how God is going to use your life in powerful ways for His glory in the future. I love you, Si!!

5 Things I'm Loving THis Week

4. Facebook Live

I’ve been testing out Facebook Live over the past few weeks and I’m starting to really, really like it. I don’t have plans to walk away from Periscope, but I’m loving learning a new live video platform — especially because it’s allowing me to connect with new people in a new way!

5 Things I'm Loving This Week

5. My Little Baseball Player

I’m SO proud of this boy for making the 6-year-old All Star Team! The All Star game was tonight and he gave it his all… Which means he’s now covered in dirt, sweat, and bruises. And he couldn’t be happier!

What are YOU loving this week? Tell us in the comments!

    
 

21 Days to a More Disciplined Life

   

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