Welcome to my weekly post where we take a break from money-related posts and I share about what I'm loving right now and give you a little peek into our life from the past week.
What I’m Reading
I can’t recommend this book, Hope Heals, highly enough if you’re feeling overwhelmed and discouraged with life. It’s the beautiful story of learning to live again, in spite of great loss.
Many people had recommended it to me and now I see why. I literally did not put it down once I had started it.
Right now, I'm reading: The Broken Way, DARE: The New Way to End Anxiety & Stop Panic Attacks, More Than Just Making It (pre-release copy), and A Secret Courage.
{See my Reading Goals for 2017. Also, see the 42 books I've read so far in 2017 here.}
What I’m Learning
Some people can go-go-go & function great! And then there are people like me… I can go-go-go for 3-4 days at a time, but then I need at least 1-2 days to recharge.
If I go full blast for more than 4 days without a break, I get irritable, grumpy, and (often) sick.
So, after a really full week with late nights at the Destination Imagination Global Finals in Knoxville last week, I took Sunday and Monday completely off. I went to bed early, slept in, stayed in my comfy pants, didn’t go anywhere, didn’t put on makeup, didn’t do live video, we had super easy meals, and I spent a lot of time just hanging out with my family and reading.
I used to be frustrated that I didn’t have the same capacity that many people do. But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate the way God has wired me.
It keeps me from overloading my schedule. It reminds me to pace myself and make space in my life to rest and recharge. And it encourages me to intentional in what I say yes to.
Space, breathing room, permission to rest & recharge… it’s a beautiful thing!
What I’m Working On
“What do you do when you feel frustrated, stressed out, and short-tempered?” A reader asked this recently.
Um, the honest answer is that I sometimes (much more often than I would like!) give in to the feelings and snap at people I love. I wish it weren’t the case, but it is.
A better response — the one that I am working on and working toward — is to slow down, step back, and stop and ask, “Why am I feeling this way? Where is this coming from?”
Those two simple questions of why and where can make such a big difference. They allow me to get to the root of the problem instead of just sitting in the leaves of stress.
It might be too much on my plate (and I need to cut myself some slack), it might be that I’m tired (and I need to prioritize sleep), it might be that I’m frustrated about a circumstance outside my control (and I need to give myself some grace), it might be hormones (and I just need to recognize this), or it might be a thousand other reasons.
Whatever it is, when I stop and ask why and where, I’m much more likely to make some headway in calming down than just continuing to ride the stress spiral down.
Other things that help me: stopping to pray and ask God to love through me, taking a Mommy Time Out (even just for 5 minutes!), getting outside (a change of scenery can do wonders!), turning on music (in my earbuds, for a bit, if need be), texting or talking to a friend (and being really vulnerable and honest).
What I Reminded Myself Of This Week
Kathrynne and I flew to Iowa on Thursday for me to speak at the Iowa Homeschool Conference on Friday and Saturday.
I woke up Friday morning feeling unsettled and inadequate. You see, every time I prepare to go on stage, I battle my lifelong insecurities.
Here’s what I wrote that morning:
“Do I really have anything to offer?”
“What if no one comes to my sessions?”
“What if my talks fall flat?”
“Will the conference organizers regret asking me to come speak?”
And on and on those voices in my head can go. Around and around in pointless circles, accomplishing nothing other than making me focus on myself and waste time worrying.
I was reminded of this quote I read from Ann Voskamp. And my heart breathed a big sigh of relief.
I don’t have to stress over trying to be exactly what I think the audience might want me to be. I don’t have to waste time wondering whether I’ll be funny enough, engaging enough, practical enough…
God is just asking me to show up as me. To be fully authentic, fully present, to focus on serving those He brings into my path, to love and give and pour myself out.
And that’s what He’s calling you to do today, too. Show up fully as the beautiful person He has made you to be. Live with your arms open wide. Give yourself away. Love like today might be your last day.
Voices in my head, you can book it. I have a mission to do today and I don’t need you to get in my way!
What I’m So Thankful For This Week
She was born during Jesse’s second year of law school. We were flat broke, we’d only been married for two years, we were 23 and 24 and just finding our way, and most people would say that it was the worst timing ever for having a baby.
Sure, it was hard many days as we were some of the only people in our law school friend group who had a baby. Yes, she was a SUPER fussy baby for the first 6 months and a really poor sleeper for the first 18 months.
But this girl has been one of the greatest blessings we could have ever imagined. She not only helped us grow up really quickly, she gave us some much-needed perspective and joy in the throes of law school life.
And now, at 12, I look at her and am so grateful we didn’t wait to start a family until it was “wise” or we were “financially ready”… because she continues to bring so much joy and life into our lives.
Also, no one tell her that she’s not supposed to think her mom is cool. Because I’ve heard that’s a thing with teens but she has yet to get the memo. In fact, she told me the other day, “I love it when you hang out with my friends. It’s like you’re one of us. And they all think you are cool!”
Moms of littles: I know that life probably feels overwhelming, exhausting, and stressful right now. You might wonder if you should have waited to have kids until the timing was better.
I just want to encourage you: focus on the blessings, keep loving and nurturing and teaching your little kiddos, and some day soon, you’ll wake up with a 12 year old who is not only really amazing and a huge help to you, but who you also absolutely love hanging out with!
Kathrynne and I had so much fun on the speaking trip to Iowa. (If you follow me on Insta Stories, you already got to see lots of behind-the-scenes videos already of my trip! I love getting to share real-time peeks into our life there!)
It was Kathrynne’s first time to visit Iowa and I hadn’t been there in a long time, so I had forgotten how beautiful it was. Plus, we loved that it reminded us a lot of our home state of Kansas!
I spoke three times: one keynote session and two breakout sessions on: Raising Kingdom-Minded Kids, Say Goodbye to Survival Mode, and Unleash Your Best You.
The attendees were so incredibly warm and receptive and kind. I hadn’t spoken at a homeschool conference in almost two years and I haven’t spoken much at all in the last year, so I wasn’t sure how it would feel to be back on the “speaking circuit” again.
I realized that speaking is kind of like riding a bike for me… once you’ve practiced it enough, you just get back up there and do it again. But I did forget how tiring it was! I love to stay and talk to every last person and really get to hear your stories and do what I can to encourage each person. But once it’s over with, I always feel like I’ve given every last drop and then I’m ready to crash into bed!
We did make time for a little fun — including attempting to play corn hole. With a big emphasis on the word attempt, for me. You can see video proof here. 😉
Another highlight of the conference: I got to briefly see my friend, Abigail. I haven’t seen her since my wedding 14 years ago!!!
What I’m Pondering
One day recently, one of my kids was disrespectful toward me. I told them that if that happened again, I would have to take away a certain big privilege.
Unfortunately, the next morning, they were disrespectful again. I calmly reminded them of what I had said the night before and told them they had lost the certain big privilege.
They were devastated. And it broke my heart to have to take something away that was so near and dear to them.
It was an opportunity for me to lean in close and let this child know how much I loved them and how sad I was that they wouldn’t get that certain big privilege.
The rest of that day, they had such a softened, changed heart and we had a wonderful day together.
When I woke up the next morning, I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to give that certain big privilege back to the child. This is not usually at all how I would roll, but I couldn’t shake this idea. I talked to Jesse, I thought about it, I prayed about it, and felt like it was the right thing.
So I went back to the child and told them that I was going to give them back that certain big privilege again. They looked at me dumbfounded: “But I don’t deserve it, Mom!”
“I know you don’t,” I quietly responded, “But I woke up this morning and felt like that’s what God wanted me to do. I think He wants you to know how much He loves you.”
My child’s face was still overcome with shock, still reeling from how they didn’t deserve this… and then they said to me, “That’s GRACE.”
My throat felt tight and my eyes welled with tears. GRACE. Sometimes we forget just how much grace God has heaped upon us. But in that moment, with my child, both of us got a very tangible reminder of just how much we are loved.
