Friday, July 15, 2016

How Our Frugal Lifestyle Benefits Our Marriage and more...



Intentional finance. Intentional family. Intentional business.

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How Our Frugal Lifestyle Benefits Our Marriage

frugal marriage

Guest post by Jennifer of The Intentional Mom

When my husband and I started our frugal journey more than 20 years ago, we had no idea what we were getting ourselves into.

We didn't realize what a commitment to frugal living would really take and we had no idea everything it would encompass. But at the same time, we had no idea that living a frugal life would benefit us in ways that extended far beyond our finances.

As we reach the point where we are almost completely debt free, I think we are both so amazed at how much we have benefited from the skills we have learned. In fact, I would even say that our frugal lifestyle blessed our marriage!

It's true… and it can bless yours as well.

Here's how our frugal lifestyle benefits our marriage far beyond our family budget:

1. We learned to be a team.

We were newly married when we took Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University class. We were still learning what it meant to be married at the time, but embarking on our frugal journey forced us to become teammates who were working toward winning at a common goal.

After 20 years and eight kids, we have been called to be teammates in so many ways, even if it's just getting through dinner!

The skills we learned being frugal teammates were an excellent foundation upon which to build.

2. We learned to lift one another up.

Maintaining a frugal lifestyle all these years hasn't always been easy.

It’s amazing to me that when one of us it tempted to spend, the other one is often able to step up and be the strong one! When my husband struggled with a certain aspect of being frugal, it provided the opportunity for me to carry the burden in that area until he was through his own personal challenge with it. He has done the same for me at times as well.

3. We learned that doing hard stuff is easier together.

When you learn to tackle hard things in one area of life, it gives you confidence to take on hard things in another area. The hard stuff is never fun to go through, but it is much easier when you are going through the hard stuff together.

4. We were able to be a strong and united example to our kids.

Being like-minded with your spouse in any area only enhances your marriage, and our commitment to how we did and didn't spend our money paints a beautiful picture of unity for our kids.

We don't agree on everything, and there are times that we are anything but a united front, but being on the same page in our frugal journey is an excellent way to show our kids how a marriage is truly designed to be.

5. We learned to make do with very little.

Because we already had numerous frugal skills in place, times of financial hardship didn’t scare us and they didn’t break us. We knew we had what it took to survive.

We had perfected the skills we needed to put into practice when we had no choice but to be frugal.

6. We have been able to bless others.

There really is nothing better than blessing the lives of those around us. Thanks to the money we save, we are able to bless others in ways both great and small — and we’re able to do it together!

Being frugal and saving money is beneficial in so many ways, but it has been amazing to reflect back and see just how greatly it has enriched our marriage as well.

Are you looking to enhance your marriage in a creative way? Try embracing a frugal lifestyle and see your commitment to one another blossom!

Jennifer is a busy, homeschooling mom of eight who enjoys keeping a home, living an active lifestyle, and loving the little and not so little people in her life. Her mission is helping other moms find contentment in living intentionally every day over at her blog, The Intentional Mom.

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2016 Back to School Cheat Sheet

Check out this comprehensive 2016 Back to School Stock Up Price Cheat Sheet - updated with Staples and Office Depot & Office Max!

Are you gearing up for back to school shopping and wondering what is a good deal to pay on all your school supplies? Check out this comprehensive 2016 Back to School Stock Up Price Cheat Sheet. (It has now been updated with Staples and Office Depot & Office Max!).

Be sure to sign up for our daily email newsletter to get all of the best back to school deals emailed to you every week! And read my post here for 5 Simple Ways to Save on Back to School Deals.

    
 

8 Ways to Drink More Water Every Day

Download a free list of 8 Ways to Drink More Water Every Day.

Check out this list of 8 Ways to Drink More Water Every Day. There is also a free printable tracker you can download.

    
 

Stop Making Excuses & Get Up & Set Some Small Goals

For 15 days, we're exploring the topic of making our health and well-being a priority as part of the 15 Days to a Healthier You series. You can read Day 1 hereDay 2 here, Day 3 here, Day 4 here, and Day 5 here

I believe one of the biggest reasons people don't get where they hope to go — or don't really get anywhere in life! — is because they don't set goals. Goals bridge the gap between dreams and reality.

It's fairly easy to brainstorm. It's very easy to day dream. It's hard to get on your work clothes and get busy. But if you don't know where you're going in the first place, it's almost guaranteed you're never going to make it there.

If you always do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten. You have to change something if you want to see change.

Yesterday, we took some time to talk about three Do’s and Don’t’s that I believe are imperative to lay the foundation for successful goal-setting. Now that we’ve laid that foundation, I want to walk you through some simple steps to successful goal-setting:

1. Jot Down ALL Your Ideas

Over the course of the next 24 hours, start jotting down every goal idea that pops into your head that you'd really like to tackle soon. Whether it’s a project you want to work on, a skill you want to learn, a fitness goal, a weight-loss goal, a desire to change your eating, the fact that you want to get more sleep, a financial milestone you want to hit, something you’d like to accomplish… there are no wrong answers!

If you're anything like me, your list of ideas will probably be very long. This is completely okay! Don’t let it freak you out or make you hyperventilate. You're just brainstorming to help you narrow down and prioritize your goals list.

The more ideas you have, the more you have to work with and streamline. So don’t hold back; write everything down that comes to mind!

How to Be Successful At Goal-Setting

2. Prioritize Your List.

Once you’ve come up with (probably) an extensive list, go over it carefully and thoughtfully considering which items on the list are really going to make a specific and near-immediate impact upon your every day life. Always keep in mind first what your priorities are for the season of life that you’re in.

Think specifically through each area of priority in your life and see what items on your list match up with those priorities and which can be instantly discarded. As you contemplate your list of ideas in light of your priorities, it might also cause you to come up with other ideas you need to add to your list. If that happens, then go ahead and add those items and go back to prioritizing your list.

3. Pare Down Your List.

After you've prioritized the list, pare that list down to the top two or three. If this is a struggle for you, step back and try to think of how each goal will directly your life.

Thinking things through to the direct effects over the course of the next few months usually is all it takes for me to prioritize and decide upon the most important priorities.

For instance, learning to make Artisan Bread is something I really, really want to do someday (along with about 50039 other things!), and it would be a fun idea to pursue at some time, but it’s not in line with my current priorities so I would pare it immediately off the list.

But making time to exercise is something that is high on my list of goals because it directly and positively impacts all four of my main priorities in life right now — it helps me stay healthier (priority: myself), it gives me more energy to be a better mom (priority: motherhood), it helps me be more creative and focused as a business owner (priority: MoneySavingMom.com), and it’s something I love getting to do with my husband every day (priority: marriage).

Not all items on your list need to positively impact all your priorities, but you had better be able to make a really strong case for how an item is going to majorly impact at least one of your priorities for it to stay on your list. I encourage you to pare down your list to 2-4 items that you feel will make the greatest overall impact on your priorities in the season of life you’re in.

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Free Printable Goal-Setting Worksheets

To help you out, here are two printable and customizable Goal Planning Forms you can download, type into, save, and print. Or, you can just print them and hand write your goals in.

4. Define your 2-4 specific, detailed, and actionable goals.

Once you have your list of the top 2-4 items you want to focus on, then it’s time to create specific, detailed, actionable goals for that focus area.

For instance, if you want to focus on getting in a better financial position, maybe you decide you want to set a goal to save a specific amount of money, or have a goal to set up your retirement accounts this year, or to read books at least 5 books on improving your financial situation, or to go through Financial Peace University, or to start a frugal friends group.

Each of these is a specific, detailed, actionable goal with a start and end date. You will know when you have accomplished the goal. That’s what makes it a goal in the first place. If your is not detailed and actionable enough to know when it is accomplished, then you need to go back to the drawing board and refine it until you get there.

5. Create your plan of action.

After you’ve defined your goal, then create a specific plan for how it’s actually going to happen. Otherwise, it will just be a good idea that never goes anywhere!

For instance, if you want to read 5 books on getting handle on your finances, you need to choose the five books, figure out when you’ll fit in reading into your schedule, and then set a goal for how much you’ll read every week.

As I just did there, I highly recommend that you break your goals down into bite-sized pieces. A big goal can seem overwhelming and daunting as a whole, but when broken down into small pieces, it becomes much more doable.

If one of the save up a specific amount of money, break it down into monthly and then weekly savings goals. Look at your budget and decide where you're going to come up with the extra money. Will you lower your grocery bill by $10 per week and then put that money toward your savings goal? Will you work an extra few hours and save that money toward your goal?

When you break your goal down to a weekly bite-sized piece, you are better able to know exactly what you need to do to stay on track. If you want to read 24 books next year, you know you'll need to read two books per month, or half a book each week. That boils down to around a chapter per day, give or take. That's much more concrete and doable than a big audacious goal of reading 24 books in a year.

 

The Secret to Goal-Setting Success

 6. Get Some Accountability.

Want to guarantee you have more success in following through with your goals? You need some accountability!

In our Make Over Your Year course, we recommend that you to set up 3 different forms of accountability:

  • A Person: a real-life person or group of people who will keep you accountable and check in on you.
  • A Product: an app, a printable, an ebook, or spreadsheet that will help you track your milestones.
  • A Party: a plan to celebrate when you reach the milestones you have set up for yourself. This gives you something to look forward to and will keep you going on the hard days.

Setting up multiple forms of accountability, gives you more motivation and it sets up a variety of checks and balances — which will hopefully help you stay on task when you want to quit or get distracted.

Remember: Do What You Can Do and Let Go of What You Can’t Do

We're all in different seasons and stages of life. We all have different challenges and struggles. Think about your own unique challenges.

Some of you are in school full-time. Some of you work full-time. Some of you have lots of little children. Some of you have a brand-new baby (or twins!). Some of you have health issues.

Some of you are caring for elderly parents or grandparents. Some of you are in the middle of moving cross country. Some of you are dealing with a death of someone you love. Some of you are pregnant or in the middle of adopting. Some of you have children with special needs. Some of you are going through heart-breaking circumstances that many of us can't even begin to imagine.

No matter your age or stage of life, you have your own set of difficulties and things to juggle. If it's not something you can change, accept it realizing that what you're able to accomplish will not be what someone else who is in a different season of life is able to accomplish. And that's perfectly okay!

I love Teddy Roosevelt's motto: "Do what you can with what you've got where you are." All we can do is all we can do.

Spending time wishing we were in someone else's shoes doesn't change or improve our situation. If you're in a really busy season of life, you may only be able to devote an extra 10 minutes five times per week to tackling your goals. Don't be discouraged.

Do what you can do and don't worry about what you can't do! Because doing something is almost always better than doing nothing.

Day 6 Project

If you don’t have any specific goals in your life right now, take some time over the next 24 hours to go through the steps outlined above and determine a few simple goals, break them down into bite-sized pieces, and set up some accountability.

If you already have some specific goals, go through the steps above and make sure your goals are in line with your priority, are doable, and that you have a specific plan of action and some accountability in place.

If you are willing, I’d love to hear what a few of your goals are. Share them with us in the comments!

How to FINALLY start being successful at goal-setting

Want Step-By-Step Goal-Setting Help?

Need some encouragement to create realistic goals and follow through with them? Go check out our 4-Week Make Over Your Year Course.

This 4-week course includes a comprehensive downloadable workbook, printable worksheets to walk you step-by-step through the goal-setting process we'll teach you, additional resources and links for each week, and 4 one-hour-long pre-recorded Group Coaching Sessions taught by my husband and me.

It's just the gentle kick-in-the-behind you need to actually be successful in goal-setting!

Get Make Over Your Year for just $29 here today!

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